I Don't Care

Before I go on I'll make this very very clear: I've never cared about Michael Phelps. I don't care how much he's swam in his life, I don't care about how many medals he's won, I just don't. It's shallow hero worship and I won't have it.

With that being said, leave the poor sod alone. Ever since the bong incident has come to light, it's

been nothing but all around condemnation. I say "poor sod" because of the tedious and empty life he leads. He swims all day, every day to keep in that shape, and at least leading up to the Olympics he lived with his mother. A grown man, let alone an international sports celebrity?

I'm glad to see him smoking a little pot, because if he had repressed himself any longer he'd certainly be on the fast track to becoming the aquatic Norman Bates.

So lay off the guy. Let him have his fun now that he's got all of his fame and fortune and whatnot. However he got it in the first place.

But most of all, let him do it in peace and stop swinging between sucking his dick and howling for his blood.